Blogarsay

Need a bethroom?

jennifer@jennifergeorge.com (Jennifer George) — Fri, 07 Jul 2006 03:46:00 +0000

I've been looking at this sign all week as I walk to work, and I find it fascinating. Are there four bathrooms, or four bedrooms? Or is a bethroom an unholy hybrid of the two?

Just Say No

jennifer@jennifergeorge.com (Jennifer George) — Thu, 06 Jul 2006 20:55:00 +0000

Many years ago, the smartest woman in the world gave me some great advice, hoping to mentor me into improving a newsletter I used to edit. She told me that being an editor is really hard, because you have to say no to people a lot. You have to be very demanding about what you choose to publish, always asking yourself if the story is interesting enough for your readers. You even have to say no to your boss sometimes, when he or she suggests a story that makes sense for internal reasons, but which you know will turn out to be a dud. It sounds obvious, but I think her point is often missed by people editing newsletters, and especially people publishing blogs.

I read a lot of blogs. I collect them compulsively as I surf the Internets. And as I peruse the blogosphere, I think about Virginia's advice a lot. As much as I believe that blogging is a revolution in our culture, I also see that there's a lot of really boring stuff out there, and as a reader, I wish bloggers would show a bit more self-restraint. For what it's worth, here are some of the pet peeves of a blog fanatic:

Don't describe your blog as "the random thoughts of..." or "a day in the life of..." Zzzzzzzzzz
Don't telegraph your humor. (Joke!) If you have to tell someone you're joking, it's not funny.
For god's sake, learn to spell.
If it's been on Boing Boing, or Instapundit, or the like, don't bother posting about it unless you've really got something to add.
(And just an aside, don't ever, ever, have music start playing automatically on your Web site. It makes me want to stab you.)

And finally, for the love of sweet boneless jebus, write shorter posts. (This one's really pushing it, I know.) Many of us read hundreds of blogs. If you can't get to the point in less than three paragraphs, maybe you shouldn't post.

Would the commenters like to add anything to the list?

New House!

jennifer@jennifergeorge.com (Jennifer George) — Wed, 05 Jul 2006 21:11:00 +0000

We moved into our new house on Sunday. Lessons learned this weekend:

We have too much stuff.
Our new high-definition TV rocks. Especially for watching Italy kick ass in the World Cup.
Crickets are a menace to society.
It's pretty sweet to drink wine in your pajamas, in your very own backyard.

Oh, and moving sucks. Hopefully we won't do it again for another 10 or 20 years.

Fox Motards Beg for Censorship

jennifer@jennifergeorge.com (Jennifer George) — Wed, 05 Jul 2006 18:32:00 +0000

Wow is right.

The 24-hour economy

jennifer@jennifergeorge.com (Jennifer George) — Thu, 29 Jun 2006 14:53:00 +0000

Dear Yahoo! Travel:

Thanks so much for being concerned about my financial security. It's great that you noticed that the phone number I provided was different than the one on my credit card account. And don't get me wrong, it was nice of you to call and check, but did you have to do it at FOUR IN THE MOTHER-EFFIN MORNING!?

I know you're in India, but jeez, a girl needs her beauty rest.

Love,
Jennifer

It is to laugh, oui?

jennifer@jennifergeorge.com (Jennifer George) — Wed, 28 Jun 2006 23:21:00 +0000

Al Zarqawi's Mom's Blog

Susan Sarandon offered to take me rollerblading in the park. I like her because she is older than me. She introduced me to someone named David Crosby. He smelled like death and excrement. And that makes me hungry. Perhaps room service will have something that i will like. I enjoy dried leaves and the flesh of small birds. If they don't have either, then they will die. Slowly - I predict!

Google Reader

jennifer@jennifergeorge.com (Jennifer George) — Tue, 27 Jun 2006 23:26:00 +0000

Looks like Google fixed a few of my complaints in Reader, but I'm still sticking with Bloglines for now.

Next Time, Sedation Dentistry

jennifer@jennifergeorge.com (Jennifer George) — Tue, 27 Jun 2006 21:21:00 +0000

Dear Dental Hygienist:

Thanks for humming a little tune as you scraped the living shit out of my gums today. It's always nice to have some music while you watch the copious amounts of blood going through the suction machine. And I appreciated the tiny amount of topical anesthetic you put on there, which brought the pain down to a nice stabbing level, rather than the intense misery I felt last time.

Am I getting old and decrepit, or are you just a hardass? My previous cleanings were simple affairs. Sure, there might have been a tiny bit of bleeding, and I always got a lecture about not flossing enough, but I never felt like crying before. Why am I reminded of Martin Amis when I visit you?

You might think that I would resolve to change my ways and start taking better care of my teeth, but I think we both know that's not going to happen. So start sharpening up those pokey tools and stock up on gauze. My inflamed gums and I will be back to see you in January.

Love,
Jennifer

Goodbye Google Reader

jennifer@jennifergeorge.com (Jennifer George) — Mon, 26 Jun 2006 23:56:00 +0000

Dear Google Reader:

Just wanted to let you know that I've decided to go back to Bloglines. I really like your smooth interface, the way you can star posts and publish them on your Web site, and your blog search, but I find it too hard to organize my feeds. You also seem a little slow in retrieving new posts, and I really hate that you don't have a "mark all read" button. You're still in beta, so there's still hope. Maybe I'll come back when you've got your shit together.

Love, Jennifer

P.S. I'm not mad, just disappointed. Your siblings, Google Notebook and Google Desktop, are awesome. I use them all the time. Why can't you be more like them?

Cats That Look Like Hitler

jennifer@jennifergeorge.com (Jennifer George) — Sat, 24 Jun 2006 02:33:00 +0000

Once, long ago, we went to an animal shelter in West L.A. to visit the prisoners. There, among the strays, we found a cat that bore a striking resemblance to a certain homicidal dictator. Since then, we've always regretted not taking little Adolf home with us. Now I can remember him at Hitler cats!, where he and his brethren are given the attention they so richly deserve. Finally, right?

Dear Evil Discussor

jennifer@jennifergeorge.com (Jennifer George) — Fri, 23 Jun 2006 14:06:00 +0000

I must spread the word about the Evil Discussor blog. I wish I could write like that.

Getting Things Done On Paper

jennifer@jennifergeorge.com (Jennifer George) — Wed, 21 Jun 2006 21:57:00 +0000

I've gotten so much accomplished in the last few days since I switched to a paper-based version of Getting Things Done! There's something magical about writing tasks down on a list and crossing them off when they're finished. Who knew?

Today's time waster

jennifer@jennifergeorge.com (Jennifer George) — Tue, 20 Jun 2006 16:58:00 +0000

3D Logic game. I was up to level 19 last night when my mind started to turn to mush and I had to go back to my usual practice of watching endless reruns of Forensic Files.

It's Not Rocket Surgery

jennifer@jennifergeorge.com (Jennifer George) — Thu, 08 Jun 2006 00:58:00 +0000

Just got back from a trip to Denver to attend a fundraiser conference. I won't bore you with the details, but let's just say there were a lot of "Livestrong" bracelets. I learned one or two interesting things, and got to steal a good joke from Robert Sharpe and make it the title of this post. Sharpe was by far the best thing about the conference. That guy knows his stuff.

I enjoyed my time in the six-block segment of Denver where I was staying, near the 16th Street Mall, which--besides the elaborately dressed goth teenagers--is a bit like a red state Santa Monica Promenade. Everyone seems to be trying just a little too hard. Exhibit A: the above sign.

The conference was in the shiny new Hyatt Regency Denver, which shows videos of cows in their elevators:

and has very cool lighting in its ballrooms:

It's right next to the Denver Convention Center, which has a giant blue bear trying to get in. Could belong to Paul Bunyan.

It's good to be home. Sweet, sweet Internet access.

Technorati Tags

jennifer@jennifergeorge.com (Jennifer George) — Mon, 19 Jun 2006 03:22:00 +0000

Thanks to Consuming Experience for teaching me how to include Technorati tags on my blog and for giving me a new way to waste time.